My handy guide to song title names and their consequences/definitions. Or something.
It's Raining Men - The Weather Girls
As a result of it raining men there are dead and injured bodies everywhere. It's chaos. When the sun comes out the whole lot will start rotting. It's going to be horrendous.
Twist and Shout - The Beatles
When you try and dance, put your back out and shout out in pain. You should know better. You need deep heat and some Nurofen Plus.
Club Tropicana - Wham
An 18-30s holiday with a guaranteed STD at the end of the week.
Working My Way Back to You - The Detroit Spinners
You dumped me and now I'm stalking you. This is now made much easier with the invention of Facebook, twitter and any other available social network sites. Plus the fact I'm outside your house with binoculars helps immensely.
Tainted Love - Soft Cell
I caught you wanking over porn. Again
I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
I'm a virgin
Stickwitu - Pussycat Dolls
I have trouble with spelling and pronunciation
Don't Cha - Pussycat Dolls
I have no actual concept of the English language
A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley
Stop talking through my favourite programme
The Tide is High - Blondie
Thanks to your terrible navigation/orienteering skills, we are now trapped on a small island, the sea is rising and we will probably drown. Fantastic.
The Long and Winding Road - The Beatles
You should have turned right
Let's Hang On - Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons
Having survived the high tide in some miraculous escape we are now clinging to the edge of a cliff thanks to your terrible navigation/orienteering skills. My fingernails are peeling from my fingers with the effort of holding on and I'm bleeding. Stop moaning that you need a weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Oh. Dead.
Another One Bites the Dust - Queen
If only I'd finished medical school
Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?
To be honest if you have to ask such a question in such a colloquial manner then I'm guessing the answer is 'no'.
Two Little Boys - Rolf Harris
Best to leave it there. Leave it. LEAVE IT.
Light My Fire - Stevie Wonder
I can't find the matches. I thought they were in the third draw down in the kitchen. Have you moved them? HAVE YOU? Why can't you just leave things alone.
Have photo of Mount Vesuvius