Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Dog's Dinner

I've not blogged in a while. Found things a bit pants since my last entry. However I have a story of the day.

Yesterday I walked the dog. The sun was out, yes I said the sun was out. It felt like Christmas but cooler. The dog and myself had a right lark. She swam in the river - I watched. She ran for the ball - I watched. She did a poo - I looked away. I picked it up - the dog watched.

We got home, I kicked off my wellies and the Minnie rolled all over the carpet to dry herself off before shaking off every last water droplet near the pile of clean washing. Then she went in the garden for a lie down to dry off what was left because you know she can't roll in the grass or shake in the garden to get dry, that would be silly.

I decided to feed her. She refused to eat the day before so I knew she was hungry. She watched me mix it all up, squashing the smelly meat between a fork whilst I told her how yummy her 'din dins' is. Why? Why do I do that? I've recently realised that I talk to babies in the same way. 'Look at your 'ickle face, look at youuuu, look at your face.' Whilst speaking those words my face contorts into a way that no human or living thing should ever see. As if doing this enhances the words.

So anyway, I fed the dog and went off to do other things. The dog watched me and followed me. Every time I stopped to turn round and look at her she would stop and paw my leg. I went room to room and she obediently followed me round, stopping to paw me every now and then. It was a bit irksome to be honest. Then I realised she was trying to tell me something. Some disaster had happened. My god!!! She was like a canine version of Skippy the kangaroo or was a new Lassie. I knelt down in front of her and said in my best Australian accent 'Strewth! What is it Minnie, tell me what's wrong?' She just pawed me and looked at me intently. At least Lassie made you follow her/him, at least Skippy had a series of clicking noises that you could decipher. I just got a paw and a sad face.

I had a think. 'Are there any children down the well? Is there a fire? Is there a fire down the well?' My accent had slipped a bit by now and sounded more Indian but I doubt Minnie really cared. I raced outside to check the local well even though there is no local well. Oh. I looked up the street expecting to see plumes of smoke. No smoke. Typical. There were no children in difficulty. Stupid children.

I decided to go to the kitchen to see if anything had happened in there. Minnie perked up and looked excited. I KNEW IT!  The sink must be on fire with children in it and Minnie was letting me know. God knows how children had got into the house never mind them getting stuck in the sink. I made a mental note to check I'd locked the back door properly. The sink was empty of children. The dog was now sat looking intently up at the work surface. I KNEW there was no children on there because it's too cluttered. Cluttered with you know, various utensil holders, salt and pepper shakers, bits of cereal and the bowl containing the dog's dinner. Oh wait. The dinner for the dog. I hadn't actually given it to the dog. This was no disaster. I felt disappointed. I gave the dog her dinner, and she had the cheek to give me a withering look whilst she ate it.

Have a before and after photo when I planted stuff in my garden.


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